Unsympathetic, insensitive mixed animal practice in mundane non-picturesque South Central Pennsylvania is in search of a unmotivated and incompetent veterinarian. Our associate veterinarians hate animals and went to vet school to get rich quick. They are minimally supported by five certifiable and opinionated technicians, six disenchanted assistants, and an intolerant practice manager. Practice owners truly have their own best interest at heart, assuring no possibilities of forward momentum for your career at any time and aim to drain your youthful excitement and vigor for as long as you’ll last. Reading and writing cursive is a must. Mentorship opportunities are few and far between only bested by the lack of cell service—make sure you’ve got an updated Plumb’s and Merck with you (not provided!). Local prospects for significant other employment now include Starbucks, Taco Bell, and a variety of college dive bars. All of this nightmare could be yours, including non-competitive compensation, questionable benefits, and outdated diagnostically useless equipment in a claustrophobic dimly lit clinic—resident colony of dust bunnies included! Drive to farm calls in fear for your life in a rust bucket on four wheels complete with leaky brake lines and stocked with equipment left behind from associates past. Shared client emergencies and rotation of mixed animal practice consisting of 80% small, 19% large, and 1% sloth.
If you can read between the lines and would like to enjoy going coming to work every day, contact Mountain View Veterinary Services in Shippensburg, PA at email@example.com Attn: Carla.
Looking to fill a current mixed animal position and add another mixed animal position or a small animal position.